How many times have you felt like sayings this to someone? Or, for that matter, have you stopped listening to the daily TV Debates, especially in English. I have, long back, for I felt that this is mere cacophony and has no real outcome with everybody talking at the same time without listening to what the others are saying. This is really sad as the society has reached a point where the use of the TWO ears that God has given us get less importance than the ONE mouth that we have. Sincere, objective listening seems to have been given a go by.
I am reminded of a deeply disturbing song written by Simon & Garfunkel under the title “Sound of Silence” which was the theme song of the old film Graduate. Some lines from this are worth reading:
(If you are interested you can get the full song from the link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RZYpzXjdtwg)
And in the naked light, I saw
Ten thousand people maybe more
People talking without speaking
People hearing without listening
People writing songs that voices never shared
No one dared
Disturb the sound of silence
And in the naked light, I saw
Ten thousand people maybe more
People talking without speaking
People hearing without listening
People writing songs that voices never shared
No one dared
Disturb the sound of silence.
How often have you seen it happening in reality? After listening to a ten-minute lecture it has been found that an average person remembers only about half of what is said, and within forty-eight hours more than half of it gets forgotten. Which means one retains only one-fourth of what he or she had heard just two days before!.
The failure to listen is the major cause of communications resulting in a lot of problems: misunderstandings, errors, conflicts and more. In fact sometimes not listening properly can be hazardous or even fatal as when an aeroplane pilot fails to hear and understand correctly the warnings of the control tower. That goes to show what an important role proper listening plays in our daily life.
Take an honest self-test to take stock of your own listening habits. Next time when someone is initiating a conversation with you, ask yourself “Am I really listening or am I just waiting for my turn to talk?”. Consider whether any of the following is happening to you. Are you:
- Easily distracted by other events?
- Faking attention, or just acting polite?
- Reacting emotionally to some words?
- Interrupting frequently?
- Start daydreaming while the speaker speaks?
- Jumping to your own conclusions?
- Finding fault with the message?
- Continuously running an ‘inside dialogue’ of what you want to say?
If any of these are happening to understand that you need to pay attention to improving your own listening habits. For that, you have to understand what are the barriers to good listening habits and how to overcome as also to learn how to cultivate good listening habits and how to enhance them.
Author:
